Monday, June 1, 2015

My Early Skating Influences

One of my first jobs was a drink vendor at Paramount's Kings Dominion, a theme park in Virginia. We were encouraged to ride the all the rides and see all the shows, so that when "guests" would ask us about them, we would have a valid answer. The Stage Show for that season was Star Trek On Ice. So I went to go see Star Trek On Ice.

Gentle Readers, I will not lie. I love Star Trek, and I love skating, but some things just don't mix. I laughed hysterically for forty five minutes. I wept when the "alien" creature was hefted up on a rope and spread her flourescent wings under a blacklight and was spun by a security officer underneath. The stage was so small, there were moments of NASCAR terror when a skater would land perilously near the edge of the stage. Nothing screams the 90's like ST:NG, and this was a quintessential 90's ice show.

When I got assigned the drink cart outside the theatre, the customers would ask me how the show was. All I could do was laugh, and they would walk away like I was insane. "GO SEE IT!!" I would call after them. "YOU WON'T REGRET IT!"

I never thought I'd see this masterpiece of unitards and fog and laser beams ever again. Imagine my delight when I casually googled this show, and I got a hit. Someone in their infinite wisdom recorded it, and put this beast on YouTube. So, I give you... Star Trek: ON ICE!!


  1. OMG! That's not even a quarter sheet!

  2. HAAAAAAAHAHAHHAAHAHAHHAAAAA!!!! Veiny winged butterfly thing!!!!