Motivation Monday

I love Power 3's. Love love love them. I loved them before I could do them, because there was just something cool about them. So, I made an effort to teach myself how to do them, and it was pretty terrible for the first few months. I'd fling myself into the turn, because that was the only way I knew how to do it, then pull into a backwards crossover, hitch up on my toepick in a straight line instead of an arc, and grind myself to a halt before widestepping into a fresh flat to wing into another turn. Anyone on the rink with me would know I was trying Power 3's by the rythmic **Scraaaaaatch**Clunk**scraaaatch**clunk** I made as I traveled.

But I didn't give up on them. Eventually I figured out that back edge, and how to hold and turn closer to the center of the lobe. I still scratch a bit, the left side still wings too fast, and my step into the new lobe is wider than it should be, but my Power 3's are one of the things I'm most proud of. I do them alternating now, along with alternating power mohawks, as a part of my warmup. I have a long ways to go on them, but they are one of the elements that shows just how far I've come.

My current "That is so cool but I can't do it" Skill is Backwards Cross Strokes. I'm sure that eventually I will do backwards cross strokes with proficiency, and remembering just how hard those Power 3's were makes the process a little easier. And enjoying the challenging Process is what makes this fun.

 

Motivation Monday

Today I got my formal introduction to Backwards 3 Turns. While these may be much like Mohawks where I did them on the wall for three months, I just have to remember that process and know that now I do Mohawks with some proficiency now.
 

 



 

So, while I do not feel wholly ready for these turns, I'm going to have faith. I did manage one on my right foot, and even though Coach was holding my hand, it was something. I'm sure that before too long I'll be doing these turns and worrying about brackets and counters.

 

Right? ....

 





Next Challenge; T-Stop

So, I got this book at the library. Seems pretty simple, t-stopping.

Yeah, I think I can handle this. So I tried it, forgetting about my new mondo edges, still pretty sharp.

Hm. I think I need to practice this some more.

I need "That Girl" back

Practice last night. For me. (Stitch is swimming with his Grandma, still avoiding the math stuff I sent with him like the plague. But he's back in just two short weeks!)

I had my skates sharpened, which hadn't happened in awhile, and I nearly faceplanted when I tried to stop. No, I told myself. You didn't catch an outside edge by accident, that is just your New Mondo Inside Edge. But onward I went, sailing a bit faster now and a bit shaky because I wasn't sure about these new edges. I took up a hockey circle and started trying crossovers. Again. This time, hold it.

Like Shuffles, my pushing foot didn't want to leave the ice. I'd try, and it would stay, and I'd get frustrated. So I'd get it off the ice, try and send it over, and abort. Self, I said. What the hell. What are you afraid of? It's not like you've never fallen, or gotten hurt, or recovered.

This isn't the girl who passed out mid-loop on a stand up rollercoaster, coming to again at some bizarre angle, only to run around and do it again. This isn't the girl who worked fly rail, holding onto a lineset badly out of balance then finding herself three feet in the air and being told to "hang on while we fix it!" This isn't the girl who tried taking apart scaffolding while she was still on it. Okay, that last one was dumb, but it was still funny. But for some reason, the part of me that says, "Try it, how bad can it be," mutes when I step on the ice. I had to get that part of me vocal again.

Okay, so what happens if I fall? I get back up. Self, I said, it's that simple. Fall, get back up. No problem. But this mental battle is shockingly hard, leaving you wresting with the notion that this is all you. Other people do it, it's clearly possible, the only thing stopping you is this mental barrier to learning in the first place. I want to skate and I don't want to fall, but skating means falling, so which is it? You can't have your skate and your proud, unbruised ass, too.

I started again. One foot over the other. I thought about rollercoasters. One foot over the other. And again, again, again. Without noticing, I sailed right over that gouge in the ice that I'd been avoiding. It didn't scare me anymore. But the Freestyle adults were doing spirals and I felt in the way, so I recused myself to the studio rink where public skate was going on.

Eventually I was doing crossovers, one after the other, with never both feet on the ice. I could keep it up for five or six strokes before I felt like I was going ninety miles an hour on those new edges and would slow down, but it was a solid improvement over last week. Rink Pal said he saw three good ones. I didn't fall, but I came close several times while trying backwards half-pumps. But I didn't let that fear stop me from trying again. Backwards crossovers look cool.

Courage in the face of yourself is hard. I'm a Legend of Zelda fan, and one of the hardest battles in the games is when you fight the "Dark" version of your protagonist character; "Dark Link." Whatever you do, he counters because he is you, everything you are only meaner. You can defeat him with the Megaton Hammer. So, I guess the lesson here is to beat that Dark part of yourself into submission.

(Yes, I know about the Din's Fire trick too, but this is ice skating. No fire.)

Don't draw attention to yourself!

Sunday afternoon I hiked to the rink, to get some practice in and to cool off. I put on skates and started tooling around, even going backwards a lap and trying to get my feet in as close as possible, as per Coach. I'm getting better. I tried stopping without needing half the rink to do so, and debated trying a two foot turn. I can do it if I go slow and I'm grazing the wall with my hand. I'm still learning the weight balance for backwards half pumps, and my left foot continues to argue, catching the outside edge while it does so and threatening to send me down. We're talking, my left foot and me.


Most people I talk to are happy to see me actually try this stuff. They're encouraging and kind, offering tips and telling me I'm not doing as badly as I think. I'm getting a new perspective, and when I talk to Stitch at night I let him know about it.

"I don't know how you do it," I told him.

"I just do," he replied.

But Sunday I was on and off the ice, coming up for air and a Diet Coke. At one point I noted that the mother I call Condor and her girl Helmet had arrived. Condor I pretty much only see on Sundays. She brings Helmet, who is around Stitch's age and old enough to know that real skaters don't wear bike helmets. Condor sits in the stands and watches her daughter with eyes of steel. She will stand up and rant, flinging out her arms, shaking her head at bad attempts and even turning away at failed attempts. Many times she has brought poor Helmet to tears with her "thumbs up/thumbs down/WTF" hand gestures.

With my new on-ice perspective, I know that it's kinda hard to hold out your arms. With everything going on at your feet, your upper body gets lost in the shuffle. When Helmet was trying three-turns, with her arms low, Condor was rolling her eyes and screaming that "This is easy! Hold out your arms!"

Uh, no. It's not. But Condor doesn't seem interested in this perspective. I've never seen Condor in skates in the year I've seen them.

Sadly, one of The Rules of suburban parenthood is that you can't really say anything to other parents. So, I averted my eyes as Condor pulled Helmet off the ice for a moment, to draw in the condensation on the glass, telling Helmet in terse words precisely why she was awful.

That afternoon I tried a fast crossover on a turn, felt the back of my blade do a death rattle against my toepick, and decided that I actually did not want to sprawl out on the ice in front of Condor, who had been staring daggers at me all afternoon. I aborted the move and decided to continue working on outside edges on the turns, extending my leg and I even caught myself pointing a toe here and there. Not bad for someone who did Tap briefly in high school. I think I'm a year out from a full on Spiral.

Thing is, I know if I fall in front of Condor, or any of the other moms in the stands who give me dirty looks for skating, the results won't be pretty.

Jumping

Stitch wants to jump. Bad. Last week I nearly had to restrain him in the grocery store as he was trying full rotation jumps next to the jarred pasta sauces. Winter has been agony with iced over sidewalks and me screaming, "NO JUMPING! STOP RUNNING! WALK!" which always sends me into mental fits because I'm stopping him from jumping on ice, which is ultimately what he wants to do. I can't wait for any semblance of Spring, so I can turn him loose again. (And those Spinning Poles on the playgrounds make for remarkable spin trainers. When people ask me how he can spin like that and not be dizzy, I point to the spinning poles in the playground across the field. Stitch spends hours on them.)


Sunday night I showed Stitch the video I took of his program. "It looked good," I said. "Crossovers and stroking were a bit weak, which is probably why you got second. But a good performance. Loved the ending."


"But I had the best spin," he protested.

"Sure, but you can't count on one element to win. They all have to be good."

He walked away.

Later, I was cleaning up the Thai food we had ordered, and Stitch was doing waltz jumps behind me.

"Stitch, you're going to bother the neighbors."

He kept jumping.

"Stitch. Why don't you do more of that on the ice and less of it in my kitchen?"

"Dunno."

"Why don't you talk to Coach and make that a part of your next program, instead of a spin? I think that's a solid goal."

"Hm."

The July Comp at Home Rink will be an ISI comp. So it will be different rules. He may be competing at a Gamma level, which is fine because he can still do a pretty good program with just crossovers, fancy turns and perhaps some (ugh) toepick hops. (Me, I want to try some dye tricks with black crystal accents.) ISI rules state that anyone in the Alphabet levels can do one and only one move from Freestyle 1. Choose between Two Foot Spin, Waltz Jump or Spiral. This is their idea of a challenge, but most girls pick up spirals like it's their job, so what you end up seeing is a bunch of basic elements connected by endless spirals. Stitch is okay at Spirals, but he kills at spins.

It's a rare thing for a Alphabet level kid to do a Waltz Jump, but I think Stitch can pull it off. We have three months, and he's got them once he learns to actually JUMP and not step into a back one-foot glide. So, if he does ISI with a waltz jump, he can't rely on that Tasmanian Devil spin anymore.

Stitch jumps all the time. Full rotation, half rotation, trying to land on one foot, etc. But for all his play practice jumping, something is stopping him on the ice. If he's afraid, I get that, and it's something he's got to work through. Perhaps setting that as a goal for the July Comp is a solid bet, and performing it may help him get over his fear of jumping. My own fear of him jumping will never die. I will always view Toepicks as inventions of evil, and whenever Coach mentions "doubles" I get faint.

Oh well. Pass the smelling salts.

USFS Parent's Guide; Volume 3

This is the third and final volume, and it's "Support your Child to Reach His/Her Maximum Potential." 

There are a total of nine pictures in this book. One is of skating judges, looking serious, next to an article on how the International Judging System Works. This was actually pretty informative, in that I know what the acronyms stand for and what the judges were looking for on each mark. I'm still clueless about specifics, but I don't think I'm alone in that. One is of a woman sleeping, next to an outlay of sleep and nutrition requirements. I presume that she is not sleeping past six am. Two are of people exercising, in an article about Off-Ice training. Yes, you have to think about it when you're not at the rink, too. The rest of the pictures are of Star Skaters.

This one is the most serious of the three, and it's more of a testament to how fast skating can take over your life. In the first volume it was all shiny pictures of happy toddlers splayed on the ice, and this one details 2,500 calorie meal plans and fitness regimens to maintain through the off-season, into the pre-season and during the skating competitive season. There's a chart detailing the levels past Basic Skills, so I know what comes next if we get that far. There's a section on Rink Relations, which seems to apply more to Clubs than individuals, and Basic Ice Usage Etiquette which should be a no-brainer but I can think of a dozen people right off I'd love to give this to.

There's some more Anagrams, one of which is "AFFIRM" which is how to "encourage excellence without being a Pushy Parent." Well, frankly I kind of enjoy being Pushy, so I made my own Pushy Parent Anagram.

P - Prioritize. What's important for right now? Tomorrow? Next week? Next Month? What elements need to be worked on and what can wait? For Stitch, the past two months have been all about Three Turns, with Shoot The Duck coming in a sad "if you can get to it" last on his practice list. What Cool Skating gear does he have to have, versus what can wait because we need to buy basics like Ice and Coach Time?
U - Understand. Understand specific problems.When Stitch says something hurts, something is itchy, or something is wrong, I get him to give me details so I can fix it.  Understand what they're doing. I typically get a rundown on elements from Coach whenever something new gets introduced.
S- Sympathize. Falls hurt. Hugs help. Humor helps. But Sympathize. When Stitch says that it's an off day because he's just not feeling it, I Sympathize We all have off days. I don't criticize or nag.
H - Help. Help out Coach, The Rink, Other Parents, Other Kids, whoever needs it. I had fun at the last Ice Show. (The more I complain, the more fun I'm having.) I have fun making costumes, retying skates, offering information to new parents, and encouraging Coach's other kids. I can't wait until Sunday because I get the double bonus of seeing Stitch compete, and then attending the Speed Skating Meet right after. Help cheer on other skaters? And eat popcorn? I'm so there! And ask for Help, too.
Y - Yourself. Be honest with it. If it seems like things seem weird, they probably are. If it feels like I'm stepping out of my bounds, I probably am. I try to take an honest evaluation of myself, and if it feels like I'm lurching towards The Dark Side of Skate Parenting, I step back.

The subtitle of this book is "Enjoy the Process." I've often heard that learning to Figure Skate is akin to running a marathon. This is the most dead on description ever. One day that Three Turn is there and on and great, and the next day it's vanished into the ether. One day the lunge looks like a dog dragged behind a car, and the next week he's Jeremy Abbott with his chest and chin to the stars. An hour later we're back to Dog Drag. It's not like Spelling, where once you get it, you've got it. The Skating skill comes, goes, comes again, stays briefly, goes away, and then it settles in and takes up residence while taking a day's vacation every so often. The frustration I can feel is incredible; "but you just did it, do it again!" This is compounded when relations come from far and wide, standing at the boards with cameras at the ready, trying to capture a one-foot spin that looked so good on Facebook last week but has now gone away for no real reason. They look at me like "where's the stunt double?"  I've since decided not to invite family to watch practices.Yes, it's a Process, and a marathon one.

Enjoy this process? Absolutely I want to. The biggest of jugs will fill drop by drop, and so we'll get there the same way. How big is the jug? Buddha also said, "Do not think of how big the universe is, it will merely hurt your head."

I really do recommend that any new skating parent get this series. For the nine bucks (including postage) it's worth it. I did come away with a better understanding of where we are, what's going on, and where we can go from here. I showed this series to another Skating Mom and she declared me crazy.

Tell me something I don't know.

USFS Parent's Guide; Volume 1

I finally got a chance to look at my new Parent Guides on the train ride home, sipping a Tall Boy and looking at lots of little girls in skate dresses. (One boy.) Volume 1 is a lot of pictures of smiling people. Smiling kids, smiling coaches, smiling pros and smiling folks with medals. It's also a lot of lists. In fact, 50% of this book is a series of lists, do's and don'ts and checklists.

Let's take a look.

The Skating Parent's Checklist:
1. Can you share your son or daughter?
 Dear Coach. You have decided to take on Stitch. I hope you like bad puns, cryptic humor, a lawyer-like reasoning why he doesn't have to do any given task, and a memory that will catch you in every fib you forget about. If you can tolerate all this, and yet hear him when he says he wants to skate for a big cheering crowd, he's yours.
2. Can you admit your shortcomings?
Every. Damn. Day.
3. Can you accept your child's disappointments?
Can I teach him to request Shirley Temples at the bar next door?
4. Can you accept your child's triumphs?
Only if I can video it in super high-res, mega definition quality and upload it to Facebook, Youtube, Flickr, Picasa and Vimeo within 24 hours with the tag "FUTURE OLYMPIAN."
5. Can you give your child some time?
Every fraction of a second I can spare, during which I will smother him with big kisses which Coach will have to wipe off his cheek with a tissue, lest he embarrass himself in front of the cute girls. 
6. Can you let your child make his own decisions?
Only if they are the right ones.

 

Do not expect this result on the first day. Or the thirtieth day.

Guidelines for Supportive Parents:
5. Supportive Parents communicate their concerns directly with the coach. Provided, of course, that the Coach isn't rolling their eyes and only marginally tolerating Parent's presence in the rink at all. Don't you have somewhere else you can be?
8. Supportive Parents avoid the use of fear. "If you don't land that Waltz Jump, there's a cold cot in the closet with your name on it!"
11. Supportive Parents avoid the use of guilt. "No, it's okay. I mean, I only spent $300 for you to get those mohawks. I know you only got second. It's okay. We can eat beans for another few weeks while you work on them. I don't mind. No, no, honey, I can skip lunch."
12. Supportive Parents show empathy for the Young Athlete. "Oh, you like Totoro? It would be a real shame if Totoro got maimed under the car, wouldn't it? You want to reconsider blowing off spin practice? I'm not really attached to Totoro. I know you like to cuddle him as you go to sleep, but cuddles with Totoro don't make national champions, do they?"

And of course the Boy is the victim of unfortunate numbering.

One of the Do's here is to "Read the Rulebook." What rulebook? The USFS rulebook? Really? I glanced over it one day when I was slow, and it scared me. Too many big words for my parental addled brain.

Another big theme is "control your emotions." In fact, this is the most often repeated phrase in this book, and one of the most difficult directives for any passionate person to follow. And Skating People are by default Passionate People. Who else was a wonderfully passionate person but kept a head so cool you could ice tea on it?

Yes, this must be you at the rink.. When Princess's mom disses your kid's back crossovers, channel Spock. When other kid snubs your kid's Group Program in the ice show because he's got a solo, channel Spock. When other Coach rudely cuts off your kid's lesson, channel Spock. When your kid does spins in the lobby without hard guards on, channel Spock. Skate Parent = Spock.

Spock wouldn't compare kids against each other. Spock just takes everyone at face value. Spock isn't upset by Other People's Irrational behavior, Spock just gets the job done.

So, what's your job? According to this guide, it's Self-Esteem, Good Habits, Proper Sportsmanship, Emphasizing Fun, Skill Development, and Striving to Win. I like this book because it doesn't pussyfoot around the Winning issue. Why compete if not to win? I know I've said to Stitch that "Skating your best is what is truly important," but let's be real. He wants that damn trophy and he wants "First Place" on it. I want him to win, too. But as Spock, I get the pleasure of taking him home after he inevitably loses, cleaning him up, and still praising him as long as he did his best. Winning can't be the end goal for me, only for Stitch. I'm Spock. Stitch is the only real competitor in this equation.

After reading this book, I have determined that Spock is truly the best Role Model for all Skating Parents. Spock wouldn't question judges, he would see them as the trained and objective volunteers they are. Spock wouldn't nag the Coach, he would just say, "Fascinating." Can you imagine Spock at rinkside, doing The Bird to encourage kids to hold out their arms? No. Would Spock screech at a four year old to "GET BACK IN THERE" after a nasty fall? No.

The next time I get the urge to critique, nag, complain or whine, I'm going to ask myself, "What would Spock do?"



USFS Parent's guide, I am now Spock at the Rink.

Skate, or Skate Not. There is no Try..

At a recent Public Skate Session I got hijacked by another mother. I'd introduced myself to her awhile ago when I retied her daughter's skates and listened to a short bragging session about her Zuca bag and new Skating Dress. Whatever, your skates are tied wrong.

Imagine my slight shock when I learned her Daughter was stumped at Alpha and Forward Crossovers. (Confession,  I can't do crossovers, either. I'm too scared to hold that outside edge. Whenever I've tried, I'm on my ass. I sympathize with daughter even if I do hate her Zuca and Skating dress.) Mom caught me as I was trying to watch Stitch do an Ice Show for me. "He's so good," she says. "How old is he?"
"Seven." I waited for part 2 of the series.
"What level is he?"
Yup. "Just passed Beta."
"My daughter can't get past Alpha. They won't pass her, but she's been doing it forever. She can't get crossovers."
"Crossovers are pretty critical."
"Why?"
At that point my brain broke. "They just are." I don't know, ask the damn coach!
"All her friends are Delta now. It's so frustrating."
"You have to learn crossovers, it can't be skipped. She'll get there."
Then mom looks back at Stitch. "He's so good. How did he get so good? Does he play hockey?"
"No, he just figure skates. But he skates all the time."
"When you say that, what do you mean?"
"He averages six hours a week."
"Oh, so six days a week."
"No, he does an hour's worth of lessons, group and private, and the rest is public skating sessions on weekends."
"What's better, Group or Private lessons?"
Shit, really? "I like doing both."
"But what's better?"
URGH. "If she's having issues with crossovers, then Privates are perfect just for helping with that. Beyond that, it depends on what she wants."
Other Mom didn't like this answer. She glared at Stitch.
"Just bring her to skate," I tried a peace offering. "Just turn her loose on public ice to gain confidence."
"She's already confident."
Clearly, Daughter was not, as her outside edges were short and wobbly. Agan, I totally sympathize, but if you want to do crossovers, you have to jump that gap.

Folks, I don't have any magic buttons or pills that I'm giving Stitch. He just likes to skate, so I bring him to skate. He doesn't always like lessons, but I remind him that if he wants those patches and trophies, then lessons and practice are the only way to get them. And you, Other Parents, if you want your kid to fly around the rink and cavort, then letting them loose is how you do it.

Here are some objections I encounter:
1. But we live far away. (Well, then you've made the decision for your kid without even asking him.)
2. But I work. (Hey, I work, too. I work 45-50 hours a week at a sometimes emotionally draining gig that leaves me limp and dragging by Thursday. But this isn't about you. Suck it up.)
3. But all they do is skate around. (Yes, getting kids to actually practice is hard. But from Tot to Beta, I don't think it matters much. Just skate. Play. Go fast. And you know what? Eventually going around in circles will get boring, at which point they'll begin challenging themselves or decide skating isn't for them. The decision makes itself.)
4. But he/she already does soccer/baseball/cheer/school play/swimming/tennis/pottery/Mandarin.  His/her schedule is packed already, there's no time for practice. (Again, you're making decisions without asking the kid. If Daughter has been trying her darndest for thirty weeks to get crossovers, then maybe you two need to sit and discuss where Skating sits on her priorities. If it's high, and it seems to be, cut something to make room.)
5. But what am I supposed to do? (Did you know actively skating burns an incredible amount of calories? And again, this isn't about you. Just don't bug your kid excessively when you skate together. Go your separate ways.)

So, Other Parents, you can hate me all you want, but my only "Secret" is Skate a Lot. Stop whining, stop making excuses, stop being a drag, and just get to public skate sessions and go. If you don't, you've ended everything before you ever really started.

The USFS Basic Skills Book

Stitch was all excited to get a Book from Basic Skills. It's pretty neat, but it's not without it's share of wacky skating weirdness. Let's take a look.

This is it. I was told, "This is his forever and ever. Don't lose it, because it's ten dollars to replace it." Okay, so you're being tasked to maintain this thing for at least two years, longer depending on how quick your skater picks up on the skills.

Inside, we find instructions. General instructions are Holy Grails for skating parents. "What do I do? Where are you going? What is that? Why is it sharp? It goes where?" This section alone answers 90% of the questions I get from other parents. I don't know why they think I know these things. Maybe it's the glazed expression. But seriously, common sense tips like "dress in layers" and "Don't talk while you're getting lessons," and "leather skates, not that crap vinyl please." Okay, they don't say Crap Vinyl, but they should.

Open it up, and you get a rundown of what skills your kid will be learning at each given step. Remember, USFS breaks skating down into its basic ingredients, unlike ISI which gives parents the whole cookie. The kids don't go right to "forward crossover," they have to do "forward 1/2 swizzle pumps on a circle" first. But the kids will start doing cool stuff like spinning a lot sooner. Two foot spins are in Basic 3, while in ISI you have to wait until FS1 for that. (Though most kids learn them long before FS1.)

You also get these. Little gold stickers that look like a cross between a Skater and a Star. I called these "Kwans." The kid gets a Kwan sticker beside each individual skill as they go. You get two sheets of Kwans, and they are hard to get off that damn paper.

Stitch, of course, wanted to put his Kwans on himself. Since they're so difficult to get off the paper, what ended up happening was that most of our Kwans became amputees. Worse, the Kwans wander off pretty easily. I've lost both sheets twice before I decided to just take the whole thing to work and staple them in the back.

The book has every basic skill badge you can get, from FreeSkate to Dance, Hockey, Speed and Pairs. This bit of confuzzlement is a Dance Pattern. Stitch looked at all of these and groaned. "Do I have to do ALL THIS to be a Big League Skater?"
"I don't think so, but talk to Coach. She knows how all this works, not me."

Then there's The Stupid Bear and his Ridiculous Sidekick. Seriously, the kids who love skating really love skating and they don't need some bear who looks high on something bad to keep them interested. This bear scares me. And when I look at the bruises on Stitch's legs, the absolute last thing I'm thinking of is a cuddly bear.

Then on the back page you can color the Ridiculous Bear, and you get a short paragraph on "What's Next." I'm guessing that we get tossed to the Clubs. I don't even know if we'll get to that point, much less if I can keep up with the book that long. Can I get a PDF with some e-Kwans?