Friday, December 9, 2011

Plain Red Turtlenecks

The costumes arrived Wednesday in a flurry of tulle and glitter. When I stopped by to drop off some sewing, I asked what the Boy's outfits were, and I got handed a metallic red button down. Plain, but okay. I could live with it.

Imagine my horror when the real outfit was not a metallic red button down. It was a plain red cotton turtleneck, bought at Target. How do we know? The tags were still on them. Worse, they were all too big. Stitch's hit him at his knees, and he wasn't the only one with that problem.

Soak this in for a minute. We parents of boys paid our money for a costume, not an outfit we could have picked up for school wear. Here were all these girls in glitter and frills, and here come the boys in ill-fitting plain turtlenecks. Dumpy, frumpy, and stupid looking, and all the boys knew it. Even thenTot boys were in plain white turtlenecks, sorely out of place with their glittery, fairy winged girls standing right next to them.

So, with a heavy heart, I went to join the ranks of the complainers. I knew the people I was complaining to were not the right people, so I kept it to a short rant and a "We need to do something."

When the boys were done with their number, we hijacked their shirts. We trimmed them, no time to hem, glittered and painted them. I stayed until roughly midnight, and I had to leave so Stitch could get to bed. He had school in the morning. They look better, more like an actual costume and not a Target purchase, but I still hate them. I hate them because they are everything that isn't fair about that show. Not a soloist? Go away. In a Group Number? No one really cares about those. Have a suggestion? Screw off. Want to help? Don't call us, we'll call you.

I glued appliques and stones on the Tot Boys turtlenecks, too. Someone has got to advocate for these little boys.

Notes were left on the costumes, stating "unavoidable delays" and "everyone will look great." Nonsense, don't buy it. A City Manager with his head up his ass is not an "unavoidable delay," and nothing says "fresh out of the package with no time to fall" like a girl with a tutu up around her chest.

But I'm just a Lunatic, Neurotic Mom, so I'm fairly sure that my complaints won't go far. I don't know how many more shows Stitch can do. I don't know how much more I can take of watching him do short choreography in a crap outfit, knowing I'm paying out the ass for the privilege. And there's only so many times I can be accused of being a lunatic before I become one.


  1. That just sucks. Do you pay a flat costume fee, and then get a non-costume when the money subsidizes the girls?

    Good for you helping those boys look show worthy!

  2. St. L, it's turtles all the way down.

  3. Last week I heard about a letter to the city, will it happen? great job spicing up the sweatshirts, thank you sooooooo very much!

  4. The shirts came out amazing. How did you draw the dragons??!!

  5. I was so impressed by the final costumes too!! You ladies are soooooooooo good at what you do!

  6. You did well. The freestyle boys costumes were definitely better than last year's.

  7. Get the Dads involved in the complaint. Dads complaining about unfair treatment of sons shakes people up.

  8. Xan asked me last night if I had a "before" picture, and I actually do. The pro pics were done in the crap turtlenecks.

    I was told that "it was never intended" that they be plain red, but what the original plan might have been, I don't know and no one else seems to either. I also don't care. Point blank, it isn't fair.

    One lady made the dragon stencil, and we assembly lined them. One lady stencilled, I outlined, Rink Pal did the sequins. Then we added the crystal eyes and frogs. But I spent more time rebuilding the beaded sequin trim on the skating director's daughter's dress. Because I wanted it to look good. I want everyone to look good, but apparently not everyone in management feels the same way.