Signs of a Poor Volunteer Effort

1. You receive three Facebook invitations from three different people, all and none of whom are claiming responsibility for the event.
2. You ask about volunteer needs to all of these people, but someone entirely different sends you an unsolicited email asking about volunteering since "you did it last year."
3. Your receive the aforementioned email three days before the event.
4. No one informs you as to whether or not they actually need your help until the day before the event.
5. While you told this person you were good at Activity X, she informs you and a dozen others in a mass email that she will try to honor activity requests, but "you will be assigned based on specific needs at that time." In other words, you have no idea what you will be doing.
6. A few hours later, you receive a different email from a new person asking for your help. This one confuses your husband and son's names.

Given my current non-relationship with this group, I'm probably going to be shoveling pony poo for three hours. You know, I think we have Practice Ice that day. Yes, I'm sure of it. Practice Ice. For six hours. Skating is tough, you know. Practice practice.